Monthly Archives: April 2010

Hats off to James McBride!

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Yesterday I had the joy of meeting acclaim writer James McBride, the author of The Color of Water.

Despite the embarrassment I received while taking a video of him, I thought that what he delivered to us was very interesting and encouraging. He had a way of telling stories not too many people have. He is the kind of person who you would not mind listening to. I wonder if he was shy or nervous while talking or if he felt completely comfortable talking to us. Sometimes the speaker would mention that they are nervous or anxious but he didn’t.

He started by telling us about our shared history in America. “Whites and Blacks have a shared history and the best thing that we can do is learn to appreciate our respective history”. I think our history is more than shared, I think it is the same if we are to look past color. It is one history. I am an American before I am African- American. Isn’t the founding fathers of this country, founding fathers of my country as it is any white person?

He continued by telling us that we know how to succeed but now we should learn how to fail. “You have to give yourself the right to fail” he said.  Of all the things I have heard as something encouraging I have to say I was at first surprised. Learn how to fail? What could he possibly mean? And what I took away is not to be afraid to fail. Failure will come and is going to come but do not give up. He continued saying When you fail, you attack what ever you are doing or trying to do, harder. He said more but I am dwelling on that for right now. At this moment in my life I have to accept and I have been accepting my failures. I’ve been greeting them and smiling through them and continuing on.

Anyways, let me tell you how he embarrassed me and how somehow right there I connected to his speech. So, here he is  talking and here I am video taping him. And towards the end of his speech he said to me: Are you video taping this? Please don’t do that. And instead of feeling embarrassed, I felt great. Number one, I was the only one who was there  video taping James McBride- the only one with a camera and using it. I also was the only one who got called out. And was not afraid to fail right there. I put his philosophy into practice. I stopped because he asked me to but the thought did cross my mind to continue. What could he or what would he had done IF I dared to continued. That would have been some story!  But I wanted him to sign my book and journal and take a picture with me so I stopped.

He is in my Hats or  Hatsnot series because he had a cool swagger about him. I promised him- well didn’t promise- but told him I would not put the video on Youtube  so you can’t see it however, it doesn’t mean I can’t put it on my blog. But his poise was very together. Very calm, cool and collected.

He did all of this with a hat and an ear ring. It was like he was the definition of coolness! He even said ‘this cat’ to describe someone. And his word choice? out of this world!Lilly and James McBride

The Pretty Boy

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So, here I am getting off the train and he’s standing on the other side of the turn thingy. You know that- what is it called again? Yeah, the turnstile thanks. So anyways, he’s standing there and makes eye contact with me. When I get up to the turnstile to go outside he stops me. And this brother is fine. Like I said, he’s one of those ‘pretty boy’ brothers who every girl likes. He gots it going for him and he knows it. Next thing I know, this brother turns to me and asks me to swipe him in cause his card is unlimited and it is not working and there is no one in the booth to fix his card. I was like, you got 2.50 or 3.00 dollars or SOMETHING to pay a sister back? He gonna say no. Well, you know you can’t get something for nothing I told him and he gonna stretch his arms out and make a face and say ‘oh, so it’s like that?’. I was like, Yep. And shrugged my shoulders and kept right on walking. Who he thought I was? An idiot? And it was obvious that he was using his looks to try to get a swipe! Oh my gosh.

Thanks Ladies!

Can we see the picture?

Sure.

It’s Hard Being Black and Beautiful

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Brothers

Ladies, let me tell you what just happened in the ladies room!  So, you- know- who was telling her girl how Clark turned her down when she asked him out. I don’t even know why she stepped up to him in the first place as ugly as she is but anyways, when I came out of the stall, they were a little surprise to see me. I asked them what happened. You know, I just wanted to be informed.

So, she started telling me what happened and her girl, jumped in and added her two sense. And Ang said- Girl, I don’t even know what you are talking about, YOU was not even there!

And, Diane said Yeah, I was. So Ang asked her what did you see?

And Diane was like I saw you get played by him. Just as bold as you were to ask him he was bold enough to turn you down. And it was funny. Espcailly since Diane started being sarcastic.

No listen, It was real funny because Ang thought this guy was into her all year!

Then, Diane was like, I am glad he turned her down. Maybe he’ll ask me now.

And I was there trying to keep a straight face. How you gonna do that to your girl? Now, can you imagine Clark asking Diane out?

They Cry for a Reason

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Some People cry because they are sad or mad

Some people cry because the sun is bright or because the airplane took flight

Some people cry because songs make them sad

The song  make me cry because I miss my dad

Like I am crying now

While doing spelling sentences, two of my students got very poetic. The last word to write a sentence for was Cry. And before you knew it, it was a poem we wrote, not a sentence.

When one of  the little girls came up with the second to last sentence, the children started talking about how much they miss their fathers. I did not know so many children I was working with were living in single parent homes. One little girl said she only see her father in the summer while someone else said that they never see their father another one said she never sees her dad even though he lives with her because he works so much. Every time he comes home, she is asleep. She cried afterwards. So we read a picturFather Holds Childe book together titled Night Shift Dad. Which made her day.

Warm Sun

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Warm Sun

Make Up By Ms. Shawanda Scott

When I look out into the world,

I see God’s Beauty.

I am not always able to enjoy it.

When I see God’s beauty,

Sometimes It doesn’t seem to see me.

Hi, can you notice me?

I think you are beautiful.

I believe you are made in God’s image.

Wonderfully and beautiful made.

Made in secret as if to surprise the world.

It seems the world forget that it was made

that they were made

that he was made

that she was made

wonderfully and beautifully

it is sometimes so cool

worse so cold.

it makes the warm sun upon your face feels like ice

it makes you shiver in the spring

it sometimes makes it impossible for you to even remember

that

Yes, I

I

even me,

was made in God’s image.

Wonderful and beautiful

wonderfully and beautifully

made.

The Rodent

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Rodents are not only in the hood. Why people act like you gotta live in the ‘hood’ to know what a freakin’ rodent is? I have friends who live in high places. Friends who live in suburbs who don’t have any rodents. It’s the way you keep your house.

Yeah, but it is more likely to be in the hood.

No, it doesn’t matter where a house is a rodent can make that its home.

I think it matters what neighborhood a house is in. If the neighborhood is just out right dirty like this one- then you are more likely to have rodents.

Now hold up- I live in this neighborhood and I don’t have any rodents. What are you trying to say anyway? I’ve been listening to everyone talk about how it matters what neighborhood you live in and all that *#%! And you, yeah you, looking at all the black and Latinos in the room saying we must have rodents in our home. Well, guess what, white people are dirty too.

so are blacks and Latinos, look at the white house.

Oh no he did not go there. He’s an ignorant son of a *&%$^. I am not even going to answer. You know what? The biggest rodent just left the white house. Look what he did to America. Made everything rodentia! He left the economy looking like the mouth of a dying mouse- gnawing and snapping and losing its life at the same time. He made the American people live and act like rodents. No one have money to pay for their mortgages being kicked out of their homes. Have to live with folks they are not even comfortable around and don’t tell me like you know because I – I know- everyone is scrambling trying to save and ending up with that one piece of cheese or bread crumb that is just a tease. Now, President Obama come in the White House and  have to be the pesticide anRodents in Classd the exterminator at the same time. Then she got personal, You have no idea what I or anyone else been through. You Roach!



Abandon Shoes in the Library

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I walked so much that day. I remember how tired I was. I just got back from an interview and still had heels on. My feet were tired. So, what did I do? I took off my shoes. Not thinking anyone was watching me.

Now, why did I take off my shoes? It just about created a frenzy in the library!

Miss Lilly has her shoes off! Look!

Wow. It’s no shoe day. I’m taking off my shoes.

Me too.

Next thing I knew, just about all the children had no shoes on! What was I suppose to do? Tell them to put their shoes back on? Sneakers , shoes, and boots were all over the library.

Lilly, can I see your socks?

Lilly, you have socks on??

I was not about to show them my feet. I covered up my feet with my skirt.  But one of them ran to me and picked up my skirt off guard:

Miss Lilly doesn’t have any socks on! I knew it!

After she hopped away, I put my shoes back on. After all, I was already getting tired of feet. Yeah, feet. I could smell it strong. And more kids were coming and taking off their shoes.

Sandy, why do you have your shoes off?

Because it’s no shoe day. Wanna smell my feet?

eww, put your feet down.

Wanna smell? smell?

I secretly promised that day that no matter what I do I will be careful around  my students. Things that I don’t even think they are looking at, they are looking at. Really closely.

It’s always that thing I think don’t matterReading with No Shoes that matters the most to them.

Hello Shoes!

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Don’t even ask me what is up with all these blogs about shoes but I actually have some more to tell you. Two stories.

First of all, I read with one of my students who are in the first grade, Ashanti, and the book she was anxious to read was titled: Hello Shoes! By Joan Blas. Even though I wore my shoes to work, ( if you didn’t read the two previous blogs you will be a little loss concerning the shoe situation) I did get a chance to talk to the children about people all over the world who don’t have a pair of shoes to wear because they are poor. After talking to them about how hard it is to find a pair of shoes around the house, I asked them why is it possible that other children as young as them in other parts of the world don’t have shoes at all.They concluded that the reason was because they don’t have a floor. Not once did I hear the word poor. But they tired their best to describe the huts in North Africa and the shacks in South America. They knew that having no shoes had something to do with not having a house like theirs. Just to think, having a pair of shoes means status. Privilege in some countries. And here, in America, it is more a norm, to the point that to have a certain type of shoe means something.   ShoesandFeet

No Shoes

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So if you read the previous blog  titled, Bare Feet, you would know that my mission for today was to wear no shoes.

I did not go to work without shoes like I promised. My outfit was just calling for some heels! I couldn’t let my outfit down!

Plus, the children always look at what I have on and complement me. I just couldn’t let them down.

Besides, I felt good in my Nine West heels. Wouldn’t you?!

However, I did go all the way to Rite Aid without shoes!! Going was shaky. I actually was scared to leave the house without any shoes on. I kept thinking about the broken glass, dog doo-doo, dog piss, people spit and what ever else they do on the street (I saw a man peeing before- so disusing) and whatever else there is out there on those streets. And what if there are hidden  diseases out there in the cracks of the side walk?

I was hoping that someone would ask me why I didn’t have any shoes on. After all, my socks were bright red! Well, the heel and the toe. But no one asked! I don’t even think anyone noticed my feet.

I walked pass a group of guys smoking. I thought for sure someone was going to look at my feet. I was ready to talk about the cause. The ‘ONE DAY WITHOUT SHOES’ event. To encourage them to buy TOMS the next time they shop for sneakers instead of  Nikes. Because if they buy TOMS a child in a poor country will receive a pair of shoes. But they didn’t even look at my feet. They just kept looking at my face. And I tried to give them signals. Like look at my feet really fast but they just kept smoking saying ‘Hey Babe!’.

I didn’t pay them any mine. I thought for sure someone was going to ask about my feet in Rite- Aid. But no one said anything. Just ‘Enjoy your Day’. Do you know I don’t have any shoes on?! I wanted to scream at the cashier!  Hey, look at my feet. No shoes. But I didn’t. I just wished her a great day and left. I thought for sure on the way home someone would ask.

I cross the street and looked at the person in the car. I know when you are driving you tend to look at what people are  wearing. Whatever, that old guy started smiling a creepy smile at me. It obviously had nothing to do with my feet.

When I was almost home, I saw two people looking at me. One was a mother with her daughter. But she just was liking my outfit. I know those faces. She smiled. Then there was this guy in a truck but his smile was to wide to ask about my feet.

People must think it’s funny that I didn’t have any shoes.

Or think it’s funny that others don’t have shoes.

No, I think, people know but don’t really care about others who do not have shoes because they have shoes and so doesNo Shoes everyone else around them. When you go for a time period without shoes you notice that everyone else is wearing shoes. You are also more in sync with the earth around you. For me, I was more in contact with the concrete jungle. I choose certain side walks to cross and kept reminding myself that I had to watch where I was going. I felt like my neighborhood was more like my home without any shoes on. At the same time I was paranoid.